Mother Mary

Today is a day of relaxation. I caught up on sleep this morning, cleaned my room, did laundry, and spent some time reading this devotion. I decided to share with you this post I read on how Catholics view Mary. Many think otherwise and this article really struck me because of my desire to form this intimate relationship with Mary. Here are the words that spoke to me:

“When Jesus was dying on the cross, He gave her to us, with our representative being St. John. Even when He was in excruciating pain, He thought of His holy mother and her welfare after He would be gone bodily from this earth. Can you see how close they must have been? She raised Him, loved Him, and stayed by His side when all others fled until the very last breath He took. If He had this kind of closeness and immeasurable affection for her while she was on earth, it then follows that He would have the same love for her in heaven. Jesus and Mary have an indelible bond that will remain throughout eternity, and that bond began at her Immaculate Conception.

Prayer is, simply put, communication. Most of the time it is merely a monolog, as we don’t expect to actually hear any response from whom we are speaking to. However, we really would like to see results and get an answer through events or circumstances in our lives. A prayer said to Mary is a communication with her. We ask her intercession on our behalf with her Son, Jesus. After we ask her for some special consideration or favor, she goes to Jesus for us. Now, we know from the Bible that Jesus couldn’t refuse His mother when she asked Him for something, even though He said His time had not yet come. Remember the wedding feast at Cana? She told Him about the lack of wine, asking Him to do something about it. Jesus told her that it wasn’t time for Him to make His Divinity known so publicly. Yet, Jesus turned water into wine. Why do you suppose that was? Because He loves His mother, and she asked Him for a favor! So, why can’t we go to her and ask her to ask her Son for us, knowing full well that He doesn’t deny her requests?

I remember that often when I was a young girl, I would go to my mother to ask my father for permission for me to get to go somewhere I wanted with my friends. It just felt like it was a good idea to have someone else, like Mom, on my side before I went to ask Daddy. Yes, I could have gone straight to him, but I felt that somehow there was less of a chance that he would refuse if Mom was behind me, approving my request. You know, if I recall correctly, most of the time this worked pretty well! Somehow, as a little child, I knew to go through Mom first. Surely I wasn’t the only little girl in the whole world doing this…. Why then, as adults, do we question this kind of behavior? Why can’t we go to our spiritual mother Mary first, and then go to God or Jesus together” (2HeartsNetwork)?

“Let us run to Mary, and, as her little children, cast ourselves into her arms with perfect confidence” (Saint Francis de Sales).

Lent Day 8- 2/26/15

Imagine

Imagine this. It is 10 degrees outside. You have thin socks, raggedy shoes, a thin coat, no hand warmers, no ear warmers, and no food. You have no tent. You have no blanket. You have no one to cuddle up to.

“1.37 million of the total homeless population in the USA are children under the age of 18. 40% are families with children, 41% are single males, and 14% are single females” (International Journal of Psychosocial Research, 2008).

 Today I went to do my CSP at Project Uplift. I dreaded going because it was something I had to put effort into. When I got there and started working, it really changed my life. The last two times I had been had been very eye opening- but my heart was set on fire tonight as I was riding through the West Bottoms of Kansas City.

It was about 10 degrees tonight, and even in warm clothes, I have never been that cold. The wind was gusting at 30 miles per hour and it was so bitterly cold that you would tremble. You meet a lot of people out there as you serve them, but two of the 75 people that we served tonight have impacted my life forever.

The first guy’s name was Joel. Joel and Jeff live on the corner of highway 435 and FISCA. I was trembling by the time we got there around 9:30 and Joel was radiating joy. He told us he did not have a tent to sleep in and that he was sleeping in the gorund. As he reached to get snacks, he barely got anything. As I asked him what he needed, all he said he needed was socks and blankets. Keep in mind this man had on such a thin coat and looked like he was in so much pain. I cannot imagine sleeping outside in that weather. I cannot imagine being in such a rural part of town and never knowing what is going to happen to you. We are buying Joel a tent so that he will be able to stay as warm as he can.

A life changing moment happened to me tonight as I got to Sean’s car wash. Sean, one of the homeless men I met, lives in an old car wash in the rural part of the West Bottoms of Kansas City. Sean is almost blind and is trying to get help, but there is really nothing they can do because it has gotten so bad. As we served Sean his food and asked him what he wanted, all he could say was that he wanted a hot meal. As we packed up and got ready to leave, he asked us if he could pray for us. We accepted.

As he says this, my mind immediately goes, “Why would he want to pray for me? Why is he ministering to us when we are ministering to him?” He asked the Lord if he would bless us and to bless him and to help him remember that he was given a great life. He asked for guidance in helping other homeless people. I truly saw Christ tonight in Sean and this memory will forever be in my mind.

This lent I really need to focus on being grateful for everything I have been given. I need to be more thankful and less selfish. Giving up these things may be hard, but it is not nearly as hard as what these people go through. I think about them as I do this and I know that Jesus Christ went through much more on the cross. He died for me, he died for Joel, and he died for Sean. He is the reason for everything I do in my life.

“If your brother becomes poor and cannot maintain himself with you, you shall support him as though he were a stranger and a sojourner, and he shall live with you. Take no interest from him or profit, but fear your God, that your brother may live beside you” (Leviticus 25:35-36).

Lent Day 7- 2/25/15

Humbled

Today in the Lenten season I feel extremely humbled. My promises I have made have been very hard to keep up with. Not listening to anything but Christian music in the car has been a struggle as well as waking up early and making up my bed. As I sit back, I know I need to readjust where my heart is. This past Monday I served the homeless and something set a fire in my soul. As Catherine of Siena once said, “Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.” We had a speaker today that really opened up my eyes to a few things. We must admit who we are and what we are going through, and we must ask others if they know Christ, because they could be going through things you would have never known.

I have been a lot in the past several years and I know that other people may not understand, but I do know that I want them too. Keeping in my feelings has always been something I have struggled with. I need to be able to build confidence in myself and in my faith. I know I can do this.

God has spoken to me several times in the past couple of years. He called me to become a leader at St. James as both community and cheer captain this year. He has called me into a very strong relationship with Jake whom I will marry later in life. He has blessed me with three amazing gifts that I could not be more thankful for. All of the bad that has happened in my life has been replaced with things that bring me joy and laughter every day.

I found a quote online that said the following, “As much as you want to plan your life, it has a way of surprising you with unexpected things that will make you happier than what you originally planned. This is called God’s will” (God is Heart).

A couple of years ago, I was planning to be in a life long relationship with a doubted mind because of the love I did not have for him. I was planning on moving back home and going to community college to become a nurse. I was planning on getting away from my family and friends. Once I finally let go of what I wanted, God called me to be an elementary school teacher. He gave me the opportunity to tutor third and fourth graders and work with teachers at St. Paul’s Day School. He gave me the love of my life and a second family that I love dearly. He gave me a spot on the college cheer team and a way to go to the school I am in love with. He gave me a conversion of heart in becoming Catholic and receiving all of Him.

As I step back and look at the cross, I know that he has blessed me with so many things even in the bad times.

“Our God is an awesome God. He reigns from Heaven above with wisdom, power, and love” (Michael Smith).

Lent Day 6- 2/24/15

Christ Forgave Me, I Must Forgive Others

This day of the Lenten season has been a tough one-my promises and goals I made for Lent have been extremely hard to keep up with. I forget to wake up earlier and to make up my bed, but the one thing I have not forgot about is how to trust in the Lord with everything that comes my way.

I thought that the message in the Mass today was one I needed to hear and wanted to hear. It was about how God forgives you for everything. He forgives you when you fall under Satan’s temptation. This is at the core of Lent and something we must understand because Jesus was in the desert for 40 days under Satan’s temptation- and we are under his temptation every day of our lives.

We must trust in Him to forgive us and try to be the best  version of ourselves we can be. This does not mean committing the sin and then praying about it after and repeating it; you must try to glorify Him and when tempted, you must ask for forgiveness from the Lord. The worst thing in life is not losing all of your money or material goods; it is when you have lost your good name that you have lost yourself. “Hate the sin. Love the sinner” (Gandhi). When I don’t forgive someone for what they have done, I am destroying their good name. Think about it- how would you feel if someone did not forgive you? You would feel like you are little- that you are not worthy of forgiveness. I must remind myself of this everyday because if Christ forgave me, i must forgive others.

Lent Day 5- 2/23/15

My Personal Happiness

Today’s lent was followed with many difficulties. It is extremely hard to get used to doing things I usually would not. I usually would crank up music that was not necessarily “Christ-like” and I usually would sleep way longer than I should and skip breakfast because I would be crunched on time.

I started reading 33 days to morning glory and I feel like God has really called me to form a relationship with Mary. I hope to form this relationship in the 33 day journey this retreat takes me on. I think that a relationship with Mary is extremely important in my life because she has endured every suffering and more that we as humans do. She is a vital part of tihe life of Jesus and I want to be in relationship with every part of Him.

A quote that I came across from my devotional from Matthew Kelley was this, “God wills only our good; God loves us more than anybody else can or does love us. His will is that no one should lose his soul, that everyone should save and sanctify his soul…God has made the attainment of our happiness, his glory” (St. Alphonsus de Ligouri). This quote really struck me today in the season of Lent. Jesus Christ died for my sins, and my giving up a pleasure that consumes a part of me, and adding things into my life for the greater glory of His son, I am doing the will of the Father. Any happiness that I endure comes from God’s greater glory. The true happiness I feel is when I do what I know God will be proud of me for. I have to listen to God’s voice and act on his will when I know what he wants for my life.

My personal happiness is derived when his will is followed, because that will is the one path that God has created for me. My personal happiness is the path God has set in stone for me, and I must follow it to achieve peace and true joy. “When we serve Him with loyalty, humility, and diligence, God will open doors for even greater blessing” (In Touch Ministries).

Lent Day 4- 2/22/15

Blessings

Trusting in the Lord all of my life has brought me to achieve so many blessings in my life. Having Jesus Christ at the center has brought me to grow in my faith, as well as in my personal achievements. I have realized that if mix the trust I have in the Lord upon the reliance of myself my calm demeanor will waver and I will not achieve the confidence I want in life nor peace. If I rely on God and trust in him, I will be happy and will have this peace in my life.

I have achieved so many blessings in my life. Currently I have been blessed with two major leadership positions such as community captain and cheer captain. I have been blessed enough that my dream since a little girl came true this month- to become a college cheerleader. The Lord has poured out all of these blessings and I am so grateful.

I know that achieving this confidence and happiness also happens during Lent. By having the confidence in myself by having trust in Him, I achieve peace. By working to be the best version of myself, I am glorifying him. Meditating on his Word and listening to what he is telling me, I move along the path he wants me to be on. The Lord is always worthy on my Trust.

This day of Lent has been a really great one but one of suffering. Waking up early was not fun this morning. I wanted to sleep another five hours but knew that the Lord would not want me to feel rushed and would not want me to miss out on the great day I had. Today we got to help many lives by collecting cans to send to those who do not have anything to eat. That is the most rewarding thing you can do, is to help others. You grow closer to God and Jesus Christ by serving the most vulnerable and I had the peace I talked about when I was doing this. Tonight I am humbled because of the wonderful boyfriend that God has blessed me with. Tonight I am being spoiled. Jake is cooking me dinner. What really sticks out to me is that Jake and I have maintained our relationship in accordance with His will. We have kept our relationship at the center of Christ.  God has truly blessed me with him- he will truly be in my life forever and I am so grateful.

Lent is about him, not me. I have to remember this. He has blessed me with so many things. “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me” (John 14:1).

Lent Day 3- 2/20/15

The Positive Power of Confidence

I woke up this morning to the last alarm; the one that was 15 minutes past when I needed to wake up. My hair looked horrible, my knees were ashy, and I did not wear pants in 10-degree weather. I did break my first Lenten promise today and it did not make me feel any better!

I was running late but made it to mass. Father Scott’s homily was really eye opening to me on lent. I need to make this Lent and everything I sacrifice and add into my life for Jesus.I came across this quote reading today that says, “As Lent is the time for greater love, listen to Jesus’ thirst…’Repent and believe’ Jesus tells us. What are we to repent? Our indifference, our hardness of heart. What are we to believe? Jesus thirsts even now, in your heart and in the poor — He knows your weakness. He wants only your love, wants only the chance to love you.”~ Blessed Teresa of Calcutta

When I was reading my devotional today, the theme was the positive power of confidence in Jesus Christ and in yourself. An amazing example of having complete trust and confidence in the Lord’s ways was Paul. Paul says in Galatians 2:20 that, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Paul’s confidence was derived from the trust and confidence in the Lord’s presence, provision, and power. If we believe that God will give us the strength and companionship to guide us through life, we will truly achieve true happiness, which is my goal to see that happiness this Lent. What matters isn’t who I am, and what I believe about myself, or my strengths or abilities. Developing a wholehearted trust and reliance on Jesus is what brings about confidence.

Lent cannot be the time where I just stick to doing things for myself that make ME feel better. I do need this in my life to attain confidence in myself and happiness ot myself, but if I do not let the Holy Spirit work in my life and devote all of this time for the glory of God, I cannot achieve this positive power of confidence in Jesus Christ.

Lent Day 2- 2/19/15

Harden Not Your Hearts

Waking up this morning I fulfilled six of my Lenten promises- to wake up 15 minutes before my alarm, to make my bed, to go to a daily mass, to have a clean room to come home to, to blog, and to drink water. I must say that I set three and woke up on the third, but each one was earlier than what I usually would have set them at. I also did not drink nearly enough water, but the fact that I filled a water bottle up for school and have not had a sprite yet is a miracle. I have also added a resolution of listening to KLOVE on the radio as much as possible without listening to inappropriate music. I have decided today to turn my blog into a book at the end of Lent- which I am so excited to see how my life changes over 40 days.

Walking into school this morning I had this sense of excitement come over me about Lent starting. The first thing I thought of was what the cafeteria was serving, but then I recognized what kind of goodness this would bring over me. As mass came, I felt this sense of peace and happiness rush over me because I was EXCITED to enter into communion with my Lord. I wanted to go to an all school mass, and usually I dread them. Something about this lent is different for me and I hope that each Lenten promise is fulfilled.

As I read my devotional today, the scripture that struck me was from 1 Timothy 12-13 as the Lord sent grace upon Paul as Paul said, “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has strengthened me, because He considered me faithful, putting me into service, ¹³ even though I was formerly a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent aggressor. Yet I was shown mercy because I acted ignorantly in unbelief…” Paul is a beautiful example as to how we should all approach our Lord. He does not tell God how sinful he is, he talks about the grace of God with this spirit of humility. As I read I recognized seven things I could do to engage in humility.

First: Die to Self. I must not only think of myself, but rather what I could do to be like God. I should not just be concerned for myself, but should be asking Jesus how I could do his will here on Earth. I must be open to any plan he has for me.

Second: Devotion. I should be devoted to preaching the Gospel. Evangelization came to mind when I read this. In order to fully be devoted to my faith, I have to invite others into it. I need to be able to ask someone if they know Jesus, and if they want to. I see myself devoted myself to Jesus by my Christian Stewardship Project this year. I am serving the homeless food, clothing, medical, and hygiene items that will better their lives. I am shining the light of Christ when I am giving to the most vulnerable.

Third: Delight. “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). I am recognizing that when the Lord blesses others, as a follower of Christ, I should delight in the good things he gives to them. I should not be envious, but happy for others who are rejoicing. I think this is a lesson I really need to focus on this lent.

Fourth: Depend. For myself, I need to learn to depend on God but not for selfish reasons. In order to live a humble life, I think it is necessary to rely on Him for everything. This does not mean I should just come to him for selfish reasons- but that I should come to Him in times of trouble, happiness, sadness, anger, envy, etc. HE should be my best friend.

Fifth: Direct. In order to live a life of humility, my thoughts and actions should always reflect his grace. I should always direct my thoughts and actions to the kind of person I want to be in order to attain grace from Jesus. My confidence will grow when I know that my thoughts and actions are starting to mirror his and not the devils.

Sixth: Distance. To live a life of virtue and humility, I must be able to distance myself from any kind of evil that is consuming my life.

Seventh: Determination. I must have determination to trust God regardless of what may happen here on Earth. When I attain this humility, I know that its the beginning of a great life.

“If Today You Hear God’s Voice, Harden Not Your Hearts- Come, let us sing joyfully to the LORD; let us acclaim the Rock of our salvation. Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us joyfully sing psalms to him. Come, let us bow down in worship; let us kneel before the LORD who made us. For he is our God, and we are the people he shepherds, the flock he guides.Harden not your hearts as at Meribah, as in the day of Massah in the desert, Where your fathers tested me; they tested me though they had seen my works” (PS 95:1-2, 6-7, 8-9).

Lent Day One 2/18/15

Eve of Lent

When I step back and ponder how I am going to enter this Lenten Season, I sit a little uneasy. My faith has not been at the strength that I would prefer. As of right now, I feel as if I am in a way a deist. As I say this, i feel as if I go to mass, I do the things I am supposed to do, but have failed to have a genuine relationship with Jesus; one that is sacrificial and one that is known. I want this Lenten season to open me up into knowing my Savior as I did before. I do not want to go to him just for times in which I am in need. I want to know what he thinks, I do not want him to have to fix everything I mess up. I know that God is a one of reconciliation, but he should be one that should be talked to out of love- not just of someone who I need due to a moment of temptation or evil.

I stumbled across a passage today from Galatians 5: 13-14. This verse states, “For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 14 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

Most of us love one another but might overlook loving ourselves. Recognzing my relationship with Jesus and finding that true happiness with myself is what is going to get me there. I have to recognize who I am to Jesus- a child of God. My devotion I read said something that stuck out to me- “All people are valuable to the Lord. But the believer’s self-worth is rooted in the fact that we have a relationship with God. We are to care for ourselves, based upon the fact that He has provided for our salvation, given us the Holy Spirit, and developed a unique plan for our life.” This is true. If we care for ourselves, then we learn to love ourselves, which leads us to full communion with our Lord. If we have a love for ourselves, we will learn his plan and prosper.

This lenten season I have many things I want to take part in in being able to find that inner peace and happiness I long for. I have several things I am going to add into my life as well as take away.

Here they are.

1) Wake up 15-30 minutes earlier than my alarm. Wake up earlier in the mornings of school to have time to take care of myself by making myself a smoothie and showering without rushing myself in the morning.

2) Making my bed everyday, so that when I come home, I come home to a made bed for me to lay in.

3) Keeping my room clean at all times, no matter the time it takes. As this lent is helping me to appreciate myself, feeling good when I come in my room will help.

4) Daily mass once a week. What better way to start off my day?

5) Rosary every week. Knowing Mother Mary and Jesus through the prayers they taught us to pray.

6) Drink lots of water. Hydrate myself. I drink way too much soda. This will help my health all around.

7) No desserts except on Sundays. Sweets make me feel groggy, sick, and unhealthy. Why should I feel that way?

8) Letter to people I care about during the lent season. What better way to feel great then by telling someone what they mean to you.

9) 33 Days to Morning Glory- taking a journey into the loving and maternal heart of Our Blessed Mother. I want to be able to say I have a relationship with her.

10) Blog. This blog will help me to gather my thoughts of each day of lent and keep up with how this season is changing my life.

2/17/15: 1st Day of Lent